Family Matters, Week 3

It's amazing how much your context for a message changes when your life changes. I have heard single messages a number of times before, having heard the "Flying Solo" message twice at Highlands. Whenever this topic used to come up, I would always cringe.

It isn't fun to be young and single, especially in the Christian context. I remember the last time at Highlands we did this message and the question spun around in a staff meeting about what I'd want to hear in this message. My gut response — I don't want to hear the message. I don't need the reminder.

Of course, I remember the last time I really got down because of feeling isolated and single. It was May 6, 2011. I had turned 30 two days previous, and I went to the movies to see "Something Borrowed." I thought it would be stupid — and it was — but it also left me shaken. Essentially the movie starts with a young woman (Ginnifer Goodwin) turning 30 and coming to the conclusion her life is meaningless because she's still single. It shouldn't have bothered me, but as soon as I heard that I almost vomited. I still can't watch the movie and cringe when I see it at the stores.

That is the message the world sends about being a young, single person. And the Christian world is even worse.

Sometimes when I was at college — at BIOLA University — I wondered if the people that ran the school were more interested in us getting our degrees or finding our spouses. And I was a guy. That pressure was magnified by 100 for ladies. It was like an annual rite of spring to see how many people were graduating and getting married.

I am grateful that God brought my wife to me, and I am thankful for the life I have now. But I'm also mindful of those who are still longing for that special connection. That's what I think of most when hearing this message again.